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Monday, September 19, 2005

Feelings are universal, only experiences are unique

Amanda Marcotte has made a post listing "the things that are wrong with me, according to the men who've loved me"...because she's leaving her boyfriend.

I don't know Ms. Marcotte (though it must be obvious I admire her blogging enormously). So, I didn't want to just tag on a sort-of anonymous mesage of support to her entry. Also, people who actually do know her seem to be covering that.

But reading her list, I'm noting ruefully how many of the things on it I've heard or infered from people who've loved me. And I don't just mean girlfriends.


I'm too opinionated.

I'm too heavy.

I'm too sexually demanding.

My voice is too loud.

People don't get my jokes.

People are put off by my honesty.

I want too much attention.

I'm a hermit.

I'm too neurotic.

I won't stand up for myself.

I'm too dramatic.

My hair's too long.

No one wants to hear that music--it's too loud/noisy/poppy/feminine.

I laugh too loud.

I expect too much.

I sell myself short.

My head's in the clouds.

I complain too much.

I overanalyze everything.

I'm angry.

I'm needy.

I'm insecure.

Your shame is never...ending
Just one psychological drama after another
We are guilty and how you ever entered into this life
God only knows, the ultimate necessity of love

-Erasure, "Drama!"

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