It's times like this I'm glad I prefer to spend money at Burger King

So, there's this guy working at McDonalds. One day, he sees a customer beating a woman. He goes over to stop it, and gets shot for his pains. He has now

undergone three abdominal surgeries and has incurred over $300,000 in medical bills.

Now: Let's say you're McDonalds. How do you respond? By putting a picture of this guy up in your restaurant, perhaps? Think for a second of how you could--legitimately--pimp the fact that your employee knew the right thing to do, and did it, at risk to himself.

So what would you do?

Well, if you were McDonalds, you'd deny him any claim to workers comp, on the grounds that he was never supposed to raise his head from the McNuggets, and if he was going to play a hero he was doing it on his own time.

Yes, really.