Apparently there's a "rush to make Hollywood's next great gay love story," in the wake of Brokeback Mountain's success. And I'm not entirely certain how I feel about that. Partly, it activates all of my "ohmygodthey'regonnabeatmetoit" fears.
Girlfriend's Boyfriend is definitely a gay love story-"great" or not I leave to others. And, as I've said before, the first time I "saw" Keitha and Colley in my head-Annabel came later-it was on a movie screen.
I would love to see a really professional director and actors with as few "divalike" qualties as they can handle-they all have a few-take on the task of telling their story. But if "another Tennesee" happened...I'd kill someone, myself, or both. At least I like to think so.
Just as in taking my characters from a stage idea to a film idea (and then two film ideas) I've been able, I hope, to take advantage of the differing strengths of each medium, now I'm trying like hell to do the same in a book idea.
There were things that I could do in a film that I couldn't do in a play, and there are things I can do in a book that I couldn't do in either. One of the things I like about the story as told in prose is that I think it's built up Annabel's character a little more. In previous versions, people have told me they like Keitha, they like Colley, they like their friendship-but I don't remember anybody saying they like Annabel.
No one's said they dislike her, but that's not the same thing. And I like her a lot, I think for reasons similar to why I liked Giovanni when he showed up in my first play, for those few of you who know it.
Annabel, like Giovanni, in some ways came the most organically of any of my main characters. When I began writing I had a pretty well-rounded idea of who Colley and Keitha were (though obviously things have been added and subtracted). But really all I knew about Annabel was that she was Keitha's girlfriend and she was gonna jump to a wrong conclusion at the start. Everything else was just kind of...there. It just showed up.
Anyway, by virtue of the fact that much of the prose version of Girlfriend's Boyfriend is told in her voice, I think/hope that it gives a fuller picture of who she is-without taking away from the others.
And I keep "discovering" things in each new version, like Annabel's thing for Frank Sinatra. I don't know if I could put my finger on what but I think that told me something about her character that I hadn't known before, or at least hadn't figured out how to show.
So I've partly put away the dream that it has to be a film...it's just that it was conceived that way.
I believe there's an audience out there for the kind of "gay love story" that Girlfriend's Boyfriend is. I "spy" on one or two "focus groups"-in other words, entertainment websites that cater to a gay & lesbian audience. And even in this L Word, Brokeback Mountain landscape I believe-I truly believe-there's desires not being met.
I emphasise that I truly believe that, for my own benefit, because experience has shown that my beliefs about my work are one hell of a rollercoaster. Sometimes I have no confidence in it whatsoever, sometimes I'm quite indecently proud of it.
Of course, I don't always like thinking of it as a "gay love story," 'cause I'm not sure it is. To me, that implies that the women would not have a problem, and there would be no story, if they were not gay. Mine is a love story. Most of my other stories have been love stories to one degree or another, but they're all much more ambivilent and bittersweet. I don't quite know why it's turned out to be easier for me to write such a story that is definitive and sweet sweet about two women, but it is something I've discussed with my therapist.
If ever there was a time to sell a "gay love story" though, it would seem to be now. So I just try to remind myself of that story about Big that I told you last month. Better to take the time get it right, and lasting, than to make it quick and forgettable.
For the record the below is what brought all this on. I haven't read the issue yet; I probably will, but one headline alone was enough to send me on this little meander. I'm not quite sure what all of the above was in aid of, but thanks to any and all of you who made it through.
Maybe I just like to redeclare my principles once in a while; to remind myself of them.
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