So he says, dad, what's the difference between theory and practice?

I've been meme-tagged by Becca. The rules (which as usual, I've done what I like with):

Theoretical Film Festival

1) Choose 12 Films to be featured. They could be random selections or part of a greater theme. Whatever you want.

2) Explain why you chose the films.

3) Link back to Lazy Eye Theatre so I can have hundreds of links and I can take those links and spread them all out on the bed and then roll around in them.

4) The people selected then have to turn around and select 5 more people.

As you'll see, I've added selected short subjects to round off some nights.

Night 1-

Resident Evil Blu-ray Trilogy
Originally uploaded by Saul Leon13

Resident Evil, Resident Evil: Apocalypse and Resident Evil: Extinction.

Probably as inspired as movies based on elements from video games are ever going to get.

Also, by programming them on night one, I'm making a statement: This festival is not going to be afraid to be stoopid. (Which, you'll remember, is quite distinct from "stupid." The Mummy Returns was stoopid. Tomb of the Dragon Emperor looks stupid.)



Night 2-Gone Baby Gone/Mystic River/The Departed.

Followed by a discussion of whether Ben Affleck will prove to be another Clint Eastwood in the young-actor-turned-old-pro-director sweepstakes.

And whether if Affleck hadn't been the director, more people would've seen Gone Baby Gone than saw the much weaker--in my view--Departed.

And whether The Departed would've won its director an Oscar if he hadn't been Martin Scorcese.

(that Gone and River are both based upon novels by the same author is merely a coincidence, in terms of my choosing them. A nice coincidence, but a coincidence nevertheless.)

Night 3-Three episodes of South Park to make one feature-length festival:

The Return of the Fellowship of the Ring to the Two Towers,


Tsst,

Miss Teacher Bangs a Boy
Originally uploaded by hujo27

and Miss Teacher Bangs a Boy.

And Saw II.



What's the theme, you ask?

Unexpected places to find family counseling, of course....

(added bonus: With this and The Departed, you can compare and contrast the brothers Wahlberg as actors.)

Night 4-Madonna: Truth or Dare/Medusa: Dare to Be Truthful

(OK, so this image of Madonna is about five years ahead of Truth or Dare. So sue me.)

First, remember Madonna when you still kinda loved her, before so many cracks started to show through. Then laugh a nasty laugh at Julie Brown's great parody.



But Medusa is less than an hour long, so we'll add an episode or two of Just Say Julie:


Night 5-Ocean's Eleven with the Rat Pack (1960)/Ocean's Eleven with Clooney, Pitt and the boys 2001.




How to remake a movie and make it better: You take a movie that needed to be remade; rebuild it from the ground up.

the texas chainsaw massacre
Originally uploaded by yans mjölk

Night 6:

The original Texas Chainsaw Massacre/The 2003 remake.

How to remake a film and make it worse: First, take a film that didn't need to be remade.

Then, try to compensate for the lack of atmosphere by having Jessica Biel bouncing around like she's got tennis balls in her bra.

(It is even more coincidental that two of the films in this festival are horror/suspense movies that have stars of the show Seventh Heaven -which I've never seen-in them. Biel, above, and Beverley Mitchell has a small supporting role in Saw II. She does a nice job.)

I don't think I'm going to tag anyone specific--if you feel like picking this up, by all means, be my guest...