"It's not...that easy being green (thank you...thank you very much, ladies and gentlemen);
Having to spend each day...the color of the leaves (yes, it's a hard, hard day).
When I think it could be nicer being red (...though I ain't no commie), or yellow (and I ain't no chicken) or gold...
or something much more colorful...like that.
(Y'know folks, why are there so many songs about rainbows?)
It's not easy being green.
It seems you blend in with so many other ord'nary things (Of course some people can't blend in, like my good friend Godzilla, who flew all the way in from Tokyo to be here with me tonight. 'Zilla? Where are ya, buddy? Stand up so the people can see you...)
And people tend to pass you over (I know that feeling every year at Grammy time. Ha! But I kid...)'cause you're
not standing out like flashy sparkles in the water (Speaking of the water, let's give it up for this wonderful wait staff. They're working hard for you. Give em a round of applause)
or stars in the sky (Yes, there are more stars here at Charlie's Electric Classic Music Club than you'll find up in the sky)
But green's the color of Spring.
And green can be cool and friendly-like (oh, the people here are so friendly).
And green can be big like an ocean, or important like a mountain (and speaking of mountains, folks, opening here next week, the wonderful Latoya Jackson! Ha! No, but I kid...),
or tall like a tree (a moment of silence, please, for our dear friend Milton Berle).
When green is all there is to be
It could make you wonder...why, but why wonder why?
Wonder (and remember tonight's performance is brought to you in part by the good people at the Wonder Bread company), I am green and it'll do fine, it's beautiful (you're all beautiful, ladies and gentlemen)!
And I think it's what I...want to be (thank you very much and God love ya-)."
The lounge lizard in his natural habitat.
("Piggybacking," which seem appropriate for a Muppets-related gag, on Tom.)
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